Jun
3
Three’s A Crowd
Filed Under too many people in the bedroom | Leave a Comment
Annabel from Canada: I’m considering having a threesome with my husband. Bad idea?
He Says: This all depends on how your husband feels about it. Gingerly approach the topic, by casually saying something like how cute you think so-and-so is. Most straight guys would absolutely be opposed to having another man in bed, but would probably like having you and another woman. On the other hand, it could backfire: he could use it as an excuse to dump you, saying you’re not interested. Be careful.
She Says: TERRIBLE IDEA unless you like girls or he likes boys. Whenever you do something like this one of three things will happen. 1. He will want it for the rest of your life. You may live a long time. Do not forget this. This may include jealousy for you or for him, addiction to sex with two people or the feeling of inadequacy in the bedroom. 2. He hates it. You love it. Or Vice versa. This scenario is nothing but embarrassing. There’s judgment going on both sides. He may think ‘She is so into it…maybe she’s really a lesbian’. Or she may think ‘He is so into her and she thinks he’s a total loser. This is humiliating.’ 3. You’re both bored. This is really the best case in my opinion… but if you’re both against a threesome then why do it in the first place? But in case you do, watch the video above first and read these tips on how to have one!
Jun
2
Whip Lash
Filed Under the pain game | Leave a Comment
Under Cover in NYC: I have been in a long relationship with a beautiful woman and I couldn’t ask for anything more except that her sexual exploration is very conservative and does not come close to my intense curiosity for sexual experimentation. Recently I fell into a conversation with a Hedge Fund executive (female) who invited me to a secretive S&M show. I am curious to go but I don’t know if I should tell my girlfriend about it knowing what the response will be or just pull the trigger and deal with the consequences afterwards.
He Says: You have to weigh the consequences and decide if it is worth it. If you go, you might really get into kinky stuff and want to go again and again, thus widening the gulf between you and your woman (assuming you don’t tell her, which it sounds like you wouldn’t). It sounds trite, but good relationships are based on trust and openness and if you’re hiding something like being into S&M, that could screw up your relationship in unforeseen ways. Your best bet is to tell her you’re really curious and invite her along. She’ll probably balk but get over it eventually and go. Who knows? She might get into it and blow you away in the sack.
© istockphoto/Jeffrey Heyden-Kaye
She Says: Your email was titled ‘The Dark Side’ and boy do you have one! Unless you want to battle the media like the Love Guv I would stay home. It’s not like I’m against sexual experimentation but once learned and loved . . . never forgotten. So while your beautiful woman at home lies in wait you’re seeding around seedy town? And then you’ll come home and the guilt will set in. That guilt festers and only allows the relationship to go in one direction. Downhill. This is a recipe for disaster my friend. Why don’t you ask your beautiful woman what her fantasy is? Maybe she’ll let you explore it with her.
Jun
2
This Is Definitely Not Swine Flu
Filed Under scary things | Leave a Comment
Patricia from Mayland: My husband came home with a rash on his extremities. We’ve been together for 2.5 years and I’ve never seen anything like it before. He says that it comes out every now and again but I’m not sure if I believe him….
She Says: When you say rash do you mean Herpes? Or do you mean something else? Thoroughly investigate Web MD and get back to me.
Jun
1
Alaskan Men Need Help
Filed Under Need Spice | Leave a Comment
Emma from Barrow, Alaska!: My husband no longer satisfies me. I’ve started to fantasize about having affairs with other men. He rarely initiates sex and I’ve become bored in the bedroom. I’ve tried to convince him to see a sex therapist, etc but he always has an excuse. We do not have any children (so I wouldn’t feel as guilty) and I feel like if he found out that I was having an affair - he may become interested again. What do you think?
He Says: It is an unfortunate biological truth that men tend to get bored doing the same thing with the same person all the time. So you need to wake it up and shake it up! Surprise him with spicy new techniques in the sack. Threatening to have an affair is counterproductive and could seriously turn him off. It’s not nice to have affairs when you’re in a committed relationship.
She Says: There are several things to address here. 1. If you have an affair; don’t tell him. He may be thinking that things aren’t right between the two of you and this may give him the perfect reason to walk. 2. Have you tried games in bed? Toys? Role play? Fab Lingerie? Maybe he doesn’t want sex because you’re not satisfying him either! 3. ‘Want him’. When you want a man they want you a lot more too. Men like succeeding. So let him. 4. Maybe you’re both just too freaking cold in Alaska and need to move! In the Bahamas… it gets pretty hot.